Sarcasm Quotes - Page 4

Oh," she said, in a very different way. "Well. Thanks for my part in the compliment. Naturally I'd love to be watched and controlled, but I think I may be washing my hair that day.

Satan impregnated my mother one lovely spring morning. We didn’t have the heart to tell my father.

You’re sure you didn’t leave? Didn’t try to explore Thunder Bay again, maybe go down to the park and, I don’t know, dismember some poor jogger?

Oh, you need Alan to betray Nick and then you'll steal Nick's powers and kill them both," said Mae. "Great idea. Hey, can i come? I'll bring a picnic lunch if you promise not to let blood get on the sandwiches.

Most of the people you read about being turned meet vamps in clubs or over the Internet...Ew, did you...?"
"Yes, I met a vampire on the Internet, went to his evil love den, and let him turn me, because I'm that brainless.

Get the point?" I asked, offering the boys a triumphant smile.
Gabriel, Zeb, and Dick stared at me, aghast.
"What? Sarcastic postkill comeback. Isn't that what you're supposed to do in situations like this?
Too harsh?

I got an 'A' in Business Marketing in college!- as if that means a goddamn thing in the real world...

Sketchy black van? Weird stalking of my house? What are you going to do next, offer me some candy?

This is where you all live?" Asked John as they ascended the stairs. "It's small."
"This is just our Thanksgiving house," Scott muttered. "We have a house for every day of the year.

It would be the last thing he did if he beat my dog.

...even though I was getting better education at home than any of the kids in Toyah, I'd need to go to finishing school when I was thirteen, both to acquire social graces and to earn a diploma. Because in this world, Dad said, it's not enough to have a fine education. You need a piece of paper to prove you go it.

वर्तमान शिक्षा-पद्धति रास्ते में पड़ी हुई कुतिया है, जिसे क�%A

I have church on Sunday.”
“Of course you do.”
“You’re welcome to come along.”
“Thanks, but I’m allergic to incense.”
“That’s a shame.”
“It’s the bane of my existence.”
- Beth and Jake

At this time of year it's easy to forget the true meaning of Christianity - the lies, the corruption, the abuse.

Oh no, praying is great, without it the thumbscrews and the Iron Maiden probably never would have been invented.

Well, it just figures," Younger told him, like a man explaining his religion.

I am not being overly harsh. Overtly hostile, yes, but exactly the right amount of harsh.

It's easy to make women happier and busier. How? Buy her a talking mirror beside bitching it has to be programmed to say, "You are looking very beautiful and slimmer," at precisely every hour.

Relationships are so much like the United States - they only really thrive when faced with an external threat.

Thank you so much for the rude know-it-all attitude while also having to look at your ridiculously colored hair and obnoxious facial and chest piercings. I am very fortunate to have just been schooled by someone who looks like they graduated from Care Bear Carnage University.