Religion Quotes - Page 4

If, as Heraclitus suggests, god, like an oracle, neither "declares nor hides, but sets forth by signs," then clearly I had better be scrying the signs.

It's awkward how some people refuse to be humans regarding their behaviours! Isn't that against God's will for he created them as humans? And yet, they at night hold hands up and ask God for forgiveness and to grant them their wishes; when he created animals sinless.

The man that takes up religion for the world will throw away religion for the world.

Laughter and irony are at heart reminders that we are not prisoners in this world, but voyagers through it.

We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love.

If Jesus came back and saw what was being done in his name, he'd never stop throwing up.

Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.

I’m an atheist and I thank God for it.

I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.

The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit.

Be sure to lie to your kids about the benevolent, all-seeing Santa Claus. It will prepare them for an adulthood of believing in God.

Who knew that the devil had a factory where he made millions of fossils, which his minions distributed throughout the earth, in order to confuse my tiny brain?

Here's an easy way to figure out if you're in a cult: If you're wondering whether you're in a cult, the answer is yes.

Hearing nuns' confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn.

If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God?

It's a lazy Saturday afternoon, there's a couple lying naked in bed reading Encyclopediea Brittannica to each other, and arguing about whether the Andromeda Galaxy is more 'numinous' than the Ressurection. Do they know how to have a good time, or don't they?

Regardless of what I think about Islam or Wicca or any other religion, the fact is that it's a group of people. Every faith has its ceremonies. And since it's made up of people, every faith also has its assholes.

See? This is why I'm not religious. I couldn't possibly keep my mouth shut long enough to get along with everyone else.

Hobbies of any kind are boring except to people who have the same hobby. This is also true of religion, although you will not find me saying so in print.

I can see how it might be possible for a man to look down upon the earth and be an atheist, but I cannot conceive how a man could look up into the heavens and say there is no God.