Humour Quotes - Page 6

I'm a poet, and I like my lies the way my mother used to make them.

Rhett: If you've made up your mind to impale someone, do it with conviction.

...There are too many idiots in this world. And having said it, I have the burden of proving it.

Sorry. i just can't seem to help myself. My brain is freaking out. Two predawn mornings in a row. It doesn't know what to think, how to act. I'll have a talk with it later. Perhaps get it some counseling.

A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.

Angelina leaned forward as Sara pulled Miki back to her, "You know what they say about curiosity? That it stabbed the annoying biker girl over and over and over again until she spit up blood.

I hate mankind, for I think myself one of the best of them, and I know how bad I am.

When danger reared its ugly head,
He bravely turned his tail and fled.

Her lips full and inviting, she has an infectious laugh and glassy cackle in her eyes, and a 2000 volt sexual charisma that beckons me like a fluff girl on scuffed knees.

If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.

Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.

We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just stuff that works.

We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!

Try patting them on the back or shoulder and telling them everything is going to be fine. Lots of times when girls cry, they don't want you to fix the problem, they just want to be consoled.

You will suffer, son of Hades!’
What else is new? Nico thought.

We started off trying to set up a small anarchist community, but people wouldn't obey the rules.

People soon get tired of things that aren't boring, but not of what is boring.

Learn to drive?"
"Never," said Quentin. "My mission in life is to be a passenger.

I’m not aspiring to be someone else – If I’m me for the rest of my life then so be it

That money talks, I'll not deny, I heard it once: it said, 'goodbye