Funny Quotes - Page 8

Nature is a porno. Deal with it.

I am in love, and the river is beginning to ice over. I’d better go drown myself before I freeze to death.


Goblin tea resembles a nice cup of Earl Grey in much the same way that a catfish resembles the common tabby. They share a name, but one is a nice thing to curl up with on a rainy afternoon, and the other is found in the muck at the bottom of polluted rivers and has bits of debris sticking to it.

Rachel opened her mouth to respond, but the head cut her off.

I might be able to walk away from sexy, dangerous shifters, but chocolate had me at its beck and call.

And finally, I've always drawn a great deal of moral comfort from Humpty Dumpty. The part I like the best? 'All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty back together again.' That's because there is no Humpty Dumpty, and there is no God. None, not one, no God, never was.

Silas consumed only one food, and it was not bananas.

Excuse me for a moment, will ye. I think I have to talk to the river,' he said unsteadily and flopped over the side-rail.

Ye are a scoundrel, a black-hearted robber and a rogue,' Stubble said cheerily to the grumbling captain. It was his usual way of haggling, and he'd beaten down the riverman to a decent price for conveying himself and Anvar to Lankarn.

Its funny when people recently change their attitude to gain entrance into your heart, which may only ignite your passion to close the door.

Love is a fairytale blah, blah, blah.

Fifteen minutes later, Justin looks at his pint of blood with pride. He doesn't want it to go to some stranger, he almost wants to bring it to the hospital himself, survey the wards and present it to someone special, for it's the first thing to come straight from his heart in a very long time.

The moment was surreal. A sometimes-autistic young man with two identities lecturing a room full of zombies on feelings and realities.

We were not actually famous, I have to add. People were just drunk.

It was all fine until the girls started drinking. (Everything is always fine up until that point.)

Why had his mother gone to the trouble of bringing him into the world if the most exciting moment in his life was having been made lame by a bayonet?

Who in the universe halts when the enemy tells them to?

You cannot negotiate art.

and I don't have to hold on with anything more than my toes

In spite of being complicated people choose superstitions over common sense.