Awkward Quotes

You know on TV when there’s one of those awkward, shocking moments and all you hear are the crickets in the background?

Well chirp fucking chirp...this is one of those moments.

If you're frightened of the countless number of books in the library, you'll never write anything, until you close your eyes and hold the pen.

I had a fucking standing ovation going on in my goddamn pants, and it was demanding an encore.

Okay," I said. "Just a normal afternoon and two normal people."
She nodded. "And so...hypothetically, if these to people likes each other, what would it take to get the stupid guy to kiss the girl, huh?"
"Oh..." I felt like one of Apollo's sacred cows-slow, dumb, and bright red. "Um...

He looked at me with serious eyes, but not the kind that made me wonder what I’d done wrong. The kind that made me wonder what I’d done right.

I mean, we're ninjas."

"Well maybe you're a ninja," I said

"You're just a really loud, awkward ninja," Margo said, "but we are both ninjas.

Uh... ," Ivy stammered, and I glanced up to see her eyes wide in consideration.
"I'm kidding," I said. "It passed the lethal-amulet test, remember?"
"Not that. You keep it in your underwear drawer?"
I hesitated, wondering why I was embarrassed. "Well, where do you put your elven magic?" I asked.

I'm usually a bit awkward in houses that I haven't been to before, so it's a way to not look weird. If I find something I've read before it automatically makes me more comfortable.

Oh. Well was this your first time painting a live model?”
She nodded her head, with an almost guilty look on her face.
“What’s it like?”
“Hard,” she replied.

A guy rubbed against me,” I say. “But I think he was just trying to get by. He rubbed me, then said sorry. It was the ‘sorry’ that made me uncomfortable. The rub was kind of interesting, but when he apologized I felt like a creep because I actually liked it.

Men lose more conquests by their own awkwardness than by any virtue in the woman.

She had the most beautiful awkwardness

Partly James was jealous because he was a virgin, but mostly it just felt really weird being in a room with two people who'd spent the night having sex. It reminded him of the feeling you get when you pull a hair off your tongue and realise it's not one of your own.

Some people tend to throw your love to the dogs when you become totally submissive to them, but when you want to get out of the heat, they pull you back into the kitchen.

When a child reaches puberty, parents become so curious about their sex lives and whereabouts, put them behind bars to their own detriment. When such a child breaks free, don't be surprised to see him/her in porn movies.

It is the responsibility of scientists never to suppress knowledge, no matter how awkward that knowledge is, no matter how it may bother those in power; we are not smart enough to decide which pieces of knowledge are permissible, and which are not. …