Lemony Snicket Quotes

I suppose I'll have to add the force of gravity to my list of enemies.

Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess.

Deciding whether or not to trust a person is like deciding whether or not to climb a tree because you might get a wonderful view from the highest branch or you might simply get covered in sap and for this reason many people choose to spend their time alone and indoors where it is harder to get a splinter.

In love, as in life, one misheard word can be tremendously important. If you tell someone you love them, for instance, you must be absolutely certain that they have replied "I love you back" and not "I love your back" before you continue the conversation.

Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like.

If you are a student you should always get a good nights sleep unless you have come to the good part of your book, and then you should stay up all night and let your schoolwork fall by the wayside, a phrase which means 'flunk'.

A passport, as I'm sure you know, is a document that one shows to government officials whenever one reaches a border between two countries, so that the official can learn who you are, where you were born, and how you look when photographed unflatteringly.

This is my knife. It is very sharp and very eager to hurt you.

They're book addicts.

Sometimes, just saying that you hate something, and having someone agree with you, can make you feel better about a terrible situation.

Siblings that say they never fight are most definitely hiding something

People aren't either wicked or noble. They're like chef's salads, with good things and bad things chopped and mixed together in a vinaigrette of confusion and conflict.

There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you, and there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.

It is difficult, when faced with a situation you cannot control, to admit you can do nothing.

Just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.

Writing is a dying form. One reads of this every day.

If you work hard, and become successful, it does not necessarily mean you are successful because you worked hard, just as if you are tall with long hair it doesn't mean that you would be a midget if you were bald.

I never want to be away from you again, except at work, in the restroom or when one of us is at a movie the other does not want to see.

Pietrisycamollaviadelrechiotemexity.

Just because something is traditional is no reason to do it, of course. Piracy, for example, is a tradition that has been carried on for hundreds of years, but that doesn't mean we should all attack ships and steal their gold.