Kevin Hearne Quotes

Yer a good lad, Atticus, mowin’ me lawn and killin’ what Brits come around.

When he said to give him the sword, I don’t think he meant for you to stick it in his guts.

People used to say obvious things ironically or as a form of understatement, but in the last few decades they seem to say it with a sense of discovery, and it worries me.

The gods damn you, look what you've done! If I want to grow this back, I'll have to endure the most terrifying sex imaginable! Gaahhhhhhh!

No. See, when you throw up you're vomiting, but when you throw down you're starting a fight, as in throwing down the gauntlet."
"Ohhhh," he said. "I thought you were speaking literally."
"I do beg your pardon. Let's literally throw up, but figuratively throw down.

And there were carved hearts in the trunks of trees with the initials of couples who felt there was no more romantic thing they could do to celebrate their love than scar the local plant life

Turns out that once you kill a god, people want to talk to you. Paranormal insurance salesmen with special "godslayer" term life policies. Charlatan's with "godproof" armor and extraplanar safe houses for rent. But most notably, other gods...

Peace be with you," I said, and as I turned to resume my journey with Coyote, I added under my breath, "and asskicking be with me.