Fran Lebowitz Quotes

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

The best fame is a writer's fame. It's enough to get a table at a good restaurant, but not enough to get you interrupted when you eat.

Magazines all too frequently lead to books and should be regarded by the prudent as the heavy petting of literature.

All the time I'm not writing I feel like a criminal. It's horrible to feel felonious every second of the day. It's much more relaxing to actually write.

There's no equivalent to Mozart in writing.

There is one thing that has disappeared, not just from the U.S. but from the entire world, is the idea of ever being embarrassed by anything.

Life is something that happens when you can't get to sleep.

Think before you speak. Read before you think.

فكر قبل أن تتكلم، واقرأ قبل أن تفكر

There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness and death.

I prefer dead writers because you don't run into them at parties.

If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.

I believe in talking behind people's backs.
That way,they hear it more than once

If your sexual fantasies were truly of interest to others, they would no longer be fantasies.

Now, nature, as I am only too aware, has her enthusiasts, but on the whole, I am not to be counted among them. To put it bluntly, I am not the type who wants to go back to the land; I am the type who wants to go back to the hotel.