Eoin Colfer Quotes - Page 2

Really, I'm trying to care, Artemis, really. But I thought it was all supposed to be over when the fat lady sings. Well, she's singing, but it doesn't appear to be over

I'm the crazy girly captain, Remember?

It took teams of LEP warlocks to slow down time for a few hours; the magic required to open a door to the tunnel was stupendous. It would be easier to shoot down the moon.
Opal tapped this into her notepad.
Reminder. Shoot down the moon? Viable?

She forces me to endure this ridiculous therapy, when the so-called counselors are little better than misguided do-gooders with degrees.

-Artemis Fowl

Other men look up and down, left and right; but men like us are different. We are visionaries.

Wait," said Butler. "Just wait, Holly. Artemis has a plan." He squinted through the green dome. "What is your plan, Artemis?"
All Artemis could do was smile and shrug.

I don't suppose you would consider peaceful surrender?

Knock yourself out... Or rather, don't.

Shut up, Julius! I mean, quiet a moment, Commander.

this was business.

Orion nodded, then asked, “Dwarf cheese?”
“Cheese made by dwarfs.”
“Oh,” said Orion, relieved. “They make it. It’s not actually . . .”
“No. What a horrible thought.”
“Exactly.

The Theory of Evolution has more holes in it than a dam made out of Swiss cheese.

Well, I don't like the first bit and I don't know the last bit. So I'm really hoping the middle bit is exceptional.

Doobie always wanted to see the badge. It was shiny, and he was eight.

Who or what inspires you?"
"I must admit that I often read my own articles in scientific journals and inspire myself.

The craft's occupants clutched their armrests, and more than one of them closed their eyes. But not Artemis. He couldn't. There was something morbidly fascinating about flying into an uncharted tunnel at a reckless speed with only a kleptomaniac dwarf's word for what lay at the other end.

Red climbed like a monkey, I to climbed like a monkey. A very old one. With one leg. And six fingers

how does she know it's the right room?' wondered Descant.
Oh, I don't know; mabye it's the magical red glow coming from the doorway, or perhaps it's the deafening howl of the temporal winds.' said Mervall.
Descant nodded.'You could be right, brother. And don't think I don't know sarcasm when I hear it.

They have gone. And the tunnel is about to close. So, boys, I am looking for someone to blame.

Will you miss him Holly?” he asked suddenly.
[...] “No,” she said. “I will not miss him.”
But her eyes told the real story.